Uninhibited Read online

  Her heart.

  To have her waiting at his beck and call? The man has to be blind or stupid or both. I only spent a few precious hours with her, but I already know, that girl is the only one who could keep me from the edge, save me from the oblivion that threatens me, whispering its twisted temptation a little louder, every day.

  One of these days, I know, it’s going to win.

  Yeah, Alicia is my salvation. I was ready to push her up against the wall the second I laid eyes on her, sink deep between those pale, creamy thighs, and show her she should never have made me wait so long. But when I opened the door and saw her standing there, with the shadow of pain in her beautiful hazel eyes, the truth hit me in a bitter crash.

  She didn’t come because she realized she couldn’t go another day without me. She’s here because of him. It wasn’t desire that drove her to pick up the phone and call. No, it was desperation.

  I’m not her first choice. I’m her last resort.

  But as we got talking, and I slipped under her innocent spell all over again, I realized something crazy. I don’t even care. I don’t care what her reasons are for running to me, I’m just so fucking grateful she’s here.

  She doesn’t know how close to the edge these last few months have driven me. That I’m steps from the precipice, that itch for the spotlight twisting in my veins.

  This could be over anytime you like, the voice taunts me. Just call your manager, get the band back together. Sign another deal, play another tour. You could have everything, right back where you belong:

  On stage in front of fifty thousand screaming fans, feeding off their adoration, blowing their minds night after night.

  I clench my fists, pushing back the dark temptation. I swore a long time ago there was no going back for me, and I still cling to that vow with everything I’ve got.

  Last time, the damage was unthinkable. This time…

  I can’t risk it happening again.

  I turn back to the house and head inside, locking up behind me. Alicia’s probably sleeping now, fiery hair tangled across her pillows. I feel a surge of lust as I pass her bedroom door, fighting the urge to open it and slide under the covers with her; cradle that lush, warm body against me and caress her awake until she wakes to her own climax.

  Fuck.

  I’m going to need a cold shower before I can sleep tonight, that’s for sure.

  I open my bedroom door and step inside, already peeling my T-shirt over my head. I toss it aside and reach for my belt, then I see the soft glow of a lamp, and the figure waiting, nervously perched on the end of my bed.

  Alicia.

  I freeze. She looks so fucking beautiful it hurts, wearing a demure cotton nightgown that covers everything, but still looks sexy as hell; her hair spilling in curls over her shoulders, dark copper in the night.

  She leaps up, eyes widening as she sees me. “I…I shouldn’t have,” she stutters, breathing fast, her luscious chest rising and falling with every gasp.

  She takes a couple of quick steps towards the door. But if she wants to leave now, she’ll have to go through me.

  I move to block her path.

  “What do you want, Alicia?” I growl, desire crashing through me in a fierce tidal wave. My self-control is hanging by a fucking thread here, and any moment now, it’s going to snap. I want to rip that cotton from her body. I want to hear those wet lips scream my name.

  “I didn’t think this through.” She flushes, looking down. “It’s just, what you said…”

  I clench my fists at my sides. I’m giving her one last chance.

  “What. Do. You. Want?” I demand, before I stop being such a gentleman and give her what she so clearly needs.

  Alicia looks back at me. Her eyes are glazed, she bites her lip, and fuck, right now she could ask me for the world and I’d fight heaven and earth to make it so.

  “A kiss,” she whispers softly. “I want a goodnight kiss.”

  8.

  ALICIA

  I’m playing with fire.

  The moment Dex steps through the door and strips off his T-shirt, I know I’ve made a massive mistake. It seemed so simple in the dark of my bedroom. One kiss, just one, to tame the reckless thoughts consuming my mind. One kiss to quiet my anxiety, already whispering all the reasons I shouldn’t have come here.

  One kiss to blot the thought of Hunter from my mind before I went to sleep.

  Take what you want, I order myself, but standing here, inches away from Dex’s half-naked frame, I realize I’m holding a lit match to a keg of gunpowder.

  His body is a miracle; taut muscles, cut and solid, a burnished gold in the dim lamplight.

  His eyes blaze darkly, ravenous, devouring me with a hungry stare.

  And his lips…his lips are all I can think about, that mouth I’ve been dreaming of for months now, my most secret fantasies right there for the taking.

  Do something! I scream inside my head. But something holds me back from closing the distance between us. I feel the seconds tick past, paralyzed by fear and habit, and Lord knows what else. He must think I’m such an idiot, he must think—

  “Fuck it.” Dex sounds a ragged growl, and suddenly his hands are gripping my shoulders, pushing me back up against the wall. I gasp at the sudden shock of sensation: body to body, every inch of him pressed against me, lips poised just a breath away from mine.

  “You want a kiss, sweetheart?” Dex dips his head lower, his breath hot on my cheek.

  I sigh, my eyes falling shut, my head spinning from the contact.

  “I’ll give you a goodnight kiss.”

  I feel Dex’s rough hand on my cheek, lifting my willing mouth up to his. I prepare myself for oblivion, ready for the whirlwind of passion; the hot demand of his lips, but when they finally capture mine, it’s with a touch so gentle, so exquisitely sweet, that it takes my breath away.

  Oh…

  Dex’s mouth moves over mine in barely a whisper of sensation, but Lord I feel it everywhere, the ripples of sweetness shivering out through my entire body. I sway into him, dizzy, overwhelmed by the hot, dense pressure of him holding me tight as his lips softly brush mine, exploring, teasing me with infinite slowness that makes me moan.

  Dex’s body flinches at the sound. He groans against my mouth, sliding his hand back to tangle in my hair, pinning me in place, but even as my body arches up against his hardness, eager for more, the gentle pressure of his mouth stays agonizingly soft.

  He takes his time, teasing me with slow, sweet kisses until I’m half-crazy with desire, shuddering in his arms, every sense heightened, every part of me desperate for more.

  I thought his kiss would obliterate the world and make me forget myself, but instead, I’m more aware, more alive than I’ve ever been. I feel myself, every part of me singing with new sensations, my body beating out a desperate thrum.

  I’ve been asleep for a hundred years, and now, God, now I’m coming back to life.

  Dex deepens the kiss, tracing gently along my jawline and down my throat, stardust shivering on my skin. He eases my lips apart, and slowly slides his tongue into my mouth; hot and probing, slow and maddeningly sweet.

  I shudder, melting in his arms. My blood is itching, heat twisting tighter between my thighs. I drink him in, clutching his bare torso, hands roving hungrily over his glorious body, hot skin, perfect muscles.

  More.

  I try to kiss him harder, but he pushes me back, forcing me in place as his mouth stays soft on mine, luxuriating in his exploration as the burn blazes hotter between us, driving me wild.

  His hands. His lips. His tongue.

  I lose track of time, of space, the very fabric of reality. There’s nothing but the two of us. I feel like I’ve melted—limbless, boneless, responding to the smallest pressure, arching up against him, desire crashing through me. My mind is stunned into submission, no longer holding me back or separated, from the outside looking in. Everything is right here, in his arms.

  This is me, all
of me. And I want him with everything I am.

  Dex breaks the kiss, and steps back with a ragged gasp.

  No! I want to scream, feeling his absence like a crash of frozen water on the flames of my desire. I reach for him again, dazed with longing, but he shakes his head, still breathing fast.

  “Not tonight.”

  I blink, reeling. Doesn’t he want me? But before my brain can function again, Dex is taking my arm and guiding me back to my room. I don’t think I can stand straight, let alone walk with my body in such a molten state, but somehow I sleepwalk beside him, as if in a dream.

  What just happened?

  How can he do this to me with just one kiss?

  “Sleep tight, my sweet Alicia,” he murmurs, brushing his lips against my cheek. And before he turns away, he whispers one final command.

  “Dream only of me.”

  9.

  Dex gets his wish.

  I toss and turn for hours that night, my body wound so tight with desire that sleep seems impossible. When I finally fall into the dark oblivion, it’s to a new kind of torment. Dreams of him, of us together, bodies entwined and gasping, lips searching in the night. I wake at dawn, restless and unsatisfied, blushing from the explicit images still flashing in my mind.

  If this was his plan to distract me from heartache, it’s working. Everything I left behind in the city seems hazy and out of focus like a distant dream.

  I toss the covers aside. Sunrise is flooding through the huge windows, just the way Dex promised, and outside, the view is breathtaking. The beach is a haven of stillness and tranquility. Just what I need. I pull on some pants and a sweater and slide the glass panel aside, grabbing my phone before I step outside. I head down the deck steps and across the sand towards the water, leaving the house behind.

  The beach is empty, save a flock of seagulls swooping and circling overhead as I stroll along the shoreline, just out of reach of the foamy surf. The wet sand is cool under my bare feet, and I breathe deeply to center myself, trying to find some sense of balance again after the past twenty-four hours have sent me spinning off-center.

  I don’t know how to process this.

  My reaction to Dex is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It’s the reason I stayed away from him for months—and the reason I’m here now. The intensity of our chemistry is overwhelming, and part of me wonders if this is all a terrible mistake.

  Surely something so reckless and wild can’t be good for me.

  Maybe a little bad is just what you need, a voice in my head reminds me. My stomach twists at the memory of Dex in the darkness last night. That spark of rebellion, the recklessness that shimmered in my veins. It’s different from everything I’ve ever told myself about attraction. Even before Hunter, I was always drawn to good guys: solid and dependable, men who would make good husbands and fathers. Boys who would never let me down.

  But Dex…Lord, that man is trouble, with a capital T on a flashing neon sign. There’s no chance of a future here, not with a rock star on the run from his own troubled demons. I’ll be lucky to make it to the end of the week, at the rate we’re burning up with passion.

  But I’m not here for a future, I’m here to forget my past. So why not go down in a flame of glory?

  I exhale, watching the ocean roll in and out in a comforting rhythm. I’ve always done this: analyzed every moment of my life, thought about the consequences of every little decision so much that before I know it, the chance has already passed me by. Dex’s kiss last night was so intoxicating because for once, I felt whole—my body and mind perfectly aligned in desire, no push-back or conflict between them. There’s no time to weigh my decisions and think about the future, not with every nerve and synapse screaming to life from his touch.

  With Dex, the only thing that matters is this very moment—right now, the two of us—and if I let myself admit it, it’s thrilling, to let go of everything like that. To finally be free from the voice of reason that’s dominated my choices all my life.

  I never had a rebellious phase, I never caused my parents a single moment of grief. I was the good one, the sensible one, who could always be relied on to do the right thing. I watched my friends and classmates make dumb, crazy choices: skipping school, running around with messed-up guys, risking everything for a few moments of pleasure.

  I never understood what could make them jeopardize their safe, stable lives. But now, for the first time, I feel the shiver of recklessness in my veins like a drug, tempting and bold. I finally get what drove them to sneak out the window in the middle of the night and cross state lines for the sake of some guy.

  Once you get a taste of this pleasure, all you want is more.

  And you can have it this time.

  Suddenly decided, I pull out my phone and tap out a couple of quick emails. I’ve got so much vacation time stored up, it won’t be a big deal to take the whole week off. Lily was right when she said nobody would care if I didn’t come in; this is the perfect time to be away from the office. We’ve shipped the winter line, and until we present Spring next month, there’s nothing demanding my immediate attention at work. As long as Jacob doesn’t burn the building down and I check in every day, everything should run smoothly without me.

  I click “send,” and just like that, I have a week. A week with Dex…the thought is even more awe-inspiring and terrifying than ever now that I know just what’s in store for me.

  If one kiss can drive me wild, I can’t fathom the pleasure I’ll discover from something more.

  But I can’t wait to find out.

  I walk slowly back along the beach towards the house, savoring the gorgeous scenery. The sun is rising high, warm in the cloudless summer sky, and I can feel the promise of vacation spreading through my bones: that first day of summer feeling, with nothing but good times and possibility ahead. As I draw closer, I see Dex up on the balcony deck, leaning out with a mug of coffee to watch the view.

  My stomach twists with memories of last night.

  “Good morning,” he calls down to me as I climb the stairs.

  “Morning,” I smile back, my heartbeat suddenly skittering faster in my chest. He looks gorgeous with his dark hair wet from the shower, dressed in a pair of faded, worn jeans and a black T-shirt that hugs the taut muscles of his chest. “You were right,” I tell him, reaching the top. “The view of sunrise is amazing. I couldn’t stay in bed.”

  Dex grins. “Sleep well?”

  “Oh yes, like a baby,” I lie, ignoring the hours I spent twisted up in the sheets, remembering his lips on mine. “You?”

  Dex answers me with a low chuckle. “You could say I was kind of…wound tight.”

  “Oh?” I blush, feeling a thrill of victory. At least I wasn’t the only one driven half-mad by that goodnight kiss.

  “Don’t worry,” Dex adds casually, “I plan on returning the favor.”

  Our eyes catch. His stare is teasing, but full of smoldering intent. My breath catches in my throat.

  Oh my.

  “Is that coffee?” I babble, breaking the stare.

  “Yes, ma’am.” Dex smiles, leading me inside. “You’re a caffeine junkie? And you said you didn’t have any bad habits.”

  “It’s my one vice,” I admit, following him to the kitchen, where—yes!—there’s a gleaming, professional-grade espresso machine perched and ready on the counter. Dex must have seen my face light up, because he laughs.

  “Well, we’ll have to work on giving you a few more.” He sets a few buttons and levers, and a moment later, the machine starts to hum.

  “Lily gives me grief all the time,” I continue, hopping up on the counter to wait. “She’s my assistant at work, and we’re good friends. She’s always teasing me about how many lattes I get through. I know it’s bad for me, but it’s the only way to get through the day sometimes. There’s so much to juggle.”

  “Alicia Wright, corporate genius,” Dex drawls.

  I look up, wondering if he’s making fun of me, but he quickl
y adds, “Hey, I’m impressed. It sounds like you really work hard.”

  I nod. “I like it. Making things run smoothly, strategizing our business plans…I always had a head for facts and figures in school. I was never artistic like you.” I nod towards the instruments in the corner of the room.

  Dex gives me a rueful look. “To tell the truth, I could have used more of your business smarts when we were starting out, we all could have. Some of the contracts I signed back then…” He grimaces.

  “They were bad?” I ask.

  “The worst. We didn’t realize it to start, we were just so happy to be finally living the dream. After being broke so long, signing with a label was like winning the lottery, you know? Suddenly, we could pay rent, and splurge on studio time, pick up a check for dinner without having a heart attack.” Dex pours my coffee into a mug and passes it to me, leaning back against the kitchen counter. “But we should have been more careful. The way it works, they pay you an advance, but that’s to cover recording the album. You’ve got to pay producers, studio techs, everything. Most of the time, you’re wiped out before you’re even done, and then you wind up owing them money.”

  “That’s crazy,” I frown. “I never realized.”

  “Neither did we, until the label sat us down and pointed out that they owned our asses.” A shadow passes over Dex’s face, remembering the past. “That’s why we toured like crazy starting out. Tickets and merch are the one way a band can make money. We pushed so hard because we had no choice, not until the record hit and the royalties started coming in. But by then…”

  He stops himself and shakes his head. “Old war stories,” he shrugs dismissively, changing the subject. “We wised up quick after that, made sure nobody screwed us again.”

  “And it looks like it paid off.” I look around at the granite countertops and designer appliances. He’s certainly not struggling to get by anymore, and it sounds like he earned every penny of his fortune. “Your folks must be proud of you.”